Lessons in Life

Tomorrow is my 49th birthday.

I like my birthday. I'm not one of those people who gets all depressed at getting older. I view aging as a natural process and I certainly favor having lived the years I have over not. The alternative, permanent option to aging is not aging at all, which is death, right? We all age, big deal.

Plus, I feel like I have a pretty good handle on my inner kid - who will swing on a swing.

Go sledding.

Dress up for Halloween.

I understand why some may fret over losing youth and moving into a new age bracket. Believe me, I get it. The stiffness in my left shoulder - which probably happened because I lifted my hairbrush or twisted in a weird way this morning - gets it.

But I am not my stiff shoulder - because I am not my body. I am not my age.

Birthdays mark the passing of time (obviously) and if we examine them in that way only, they can leave us with a feeling of not having accomplished enough. We mark milestones in terms of birthdays. We have expectations (or as the writer Anne Lamott calls them, resentments under construction) about what our lives are supposed to look like at each age.

As we age, we expect a certain level of status, family or otherwise to have taken effect. These kinds of things happen naturally - we're humans, who follow the orderly progression of time, you see.

I feel pretty good about how time is progressing for me. I have a happy marriage, my teenage daughter is about to graduate high school and has selected a reputable university to continue her education and athletic endeavors. I have a home, a job, I'm surrounded by people who love me and really what else is there in life to want or need?

This birthday in particular finds me in the process of completing a task I set for myself several years ago. I spoke the words:

I want to be a yoga teacher by the time I'm 50

That task will be completed at the end of April, in my 49th year. Rarely do I have goals so clearly stated, with an expiration date assigned, no less... and yet for this one - I said it out loud to many people, I meditated on it, I researched several yoga schools and applied to a few teacher training programs before enrolling in my current program.

I'm ahead of the schedule I put myself on and that's great - but so what. What I choose to see as important here is the lesson of stating a goal and working toward it. That was the difference in this instance. I focused on what I wanted and did (and continue to do) the work to bring it about.

It took me years to learn that life lesson (48 years and 364 days, to be exact)