Just Say Maybe

Cheers to my favorite dreamer
photo by Janet Moscarello

I have been loving and living with a dreamer for the better part of the last twenty years. This experience has taught me a few things about myself and about how to best respond to the fantasizing that inevitably comes with the territory. 

As I'm writing this, the most prominent thing in my mind is that the first response to a spoken aloud dream can't be "No". 

I used to always just put up roadblocks and obstacles and objections and why it won't work. Seriously. I did all those things. Many times I did them together one right after the other like I just wrote it out. Understandably, this habit energy earned for me, a reputation for being difficult. 

I don't think that's who I am. 

At least it isn't who I want to be.

When we traveled to Portugal - my dreamer looked at property listings - that is, when he wasn't mesmerized by the death-by-pastry displays in window shops.

his happy place is where there's pastry

When we were in San Diego, again, he immediately started dreaming. Looking at property listings. Fantasizing about the potential for our family to relocate to California became a topic of conversation. My "maybe attitude" even spilled over onto social media, prompting a questioning phone call or two. Wild right? Yep. Especially given my hard-earned naysayer rep.

A simple shift in my mindset allowed this fantasy to play out. It was easier and better for both of us, for me to respond "maybe" not "no". Sure, I thought to myself what about my family, what about the cost of living? What about my job? What about teaching yoga? 

I'm no closer to having answers to all those questions - but I showed that I can be open to possibility and I enjoyed the freedom that offered me. It sucks to be the naysayer. Trust me.

How does that relate to a yoga asana practice? Well, thanks for asking. We've all got 'em, those goal poses, the ones to work on...mine for a while was pincha mayurasana or forearm stand.

early in my practice of pincha circa 2016

Maybe you see a pose that someone can do and you think to yourself, all the obstacles of why you can't do it. Let's acknowledge that there are real obstacles, anatomy, physiology, ability, strength, all of those things, but some of those things can evolve to allow you to progress into a pose that you thought never was possible. 

The sequence I've been teaching lately has a peak pose of flying pigeon - at one time it was a goal pose of mine - so I'm hopeful that after a month or so, my students will see progress.

flying pigeon circa 2016

So remember that the next time you get on your mat. Think to yourself maybe something new is possible, something you dream about, and allow that possibility to fill you with hope. 

And maybe spark the dreamer in you